One.

Gu Yanting found that he and Tang Yi hadn’t quarrelled for a long time.

This started a month ago.

Weiwei was officially picked up by Zhou Hao a month ago. Gu Yanting had already put his affairs in order before; Huayuan set up an office in T City, and he became the field commander of the office. Although the daily workload was huge, the degree of freedom was quite high. So he also worked as a nanny, cook and driver for Tang Yi and Weiwei for more than three months.

However, even so, the two bickered a lot in front of the child.

Under normal circumstances, no matter what the reason was, the family war would end with Tang Yi’s victory. Of course, Gu Yanting deliberately gave in to the opponent, because every time Tang Yi won, he would be good-natured enough to cooperate with him in this way and that, whether out of compensation or pure joy. Gu Yanting was pretty happy to exchange that for his face.

But since Weiwei was picked up, Tang Yi stopped arguing with him.

Sometimes Gu Yanting would deliberately be lazy and throw a smelly sock on the sofa, or the changed pants would not be put in the laundry basket but thrown directly on the floor of the bedroom. Tang Yi didn’t even make a sound, just gave him a look and silently put them away for him.

At the beginning, Gu Yanting was quite happy, and the second and third time, he started to rejoice. When the fourth and fifth time came, he suddenly shivered and a terrifying speculation came to his mind – this was obviously more like the calm before the storm than the sweet life of a husband and wife.

When this idea first came, he was writing a report at work, and the little thought quickly took root in his mind, but it took a while for the branches and leaves to occupy his brain capacity. Gu Yanting’s body jolted and, after regaining his senses, he hurried back in horror. Even the sweat on his forehead was spelling out a line of large characters “Tang Yi wants to break up with me.”

The house was cleaned up and all the shoes by the entrance were put in the shoe cabinet. The sofa cover was stretched without a single wrinkle and all the things in the trash basket were taken away. Gu Yanting was in a daze. He obviously tidied up the house himself, but now he could see that there was something unusual about it, something dangerous.

He wiped away his sweat and hurriedly trotted into the bedroom. They both had their documents in a small transparent box on the bedside table. Gu Yanting hurriedly pulled it onto the bed and shook the transparent box upside down. After everything fell out, he took a deep breath and felt that his heart was about to stop.

— Tang Yi’s ID card and passport were not there!

How could they not be here? Was he carrying them with him? Or did he hide them somewhere else? Would Tang Yi not come back today?

Calm down, calm down!

After Gu Yanting was in a frightened daze for a moment, he calmed down. While quickly recalling the morning episodes to see if there was anything unusual, he dialled Tang Yi’s mobile phone number.

The phone was quickly connected and Tang Yi’s smiling voice came from the other end of the phone, seemingly in a good mood, “Yanting? What happened?”

“Ah, it’s okay,” Gu Yanting coughed lightly, carefully clutching the phone, and said, “Are you busy now?”

“Not busy.” Tang Yi smiled.

“…Oh,” Gu Yanting paused, and after chatting for a long time, he pretended to ask inadvertently, “Where’s your ID card? I didn’t see it when I cleaned up the house today.”

His tone was slightly hurried, and he couldn’t even breathe nervously after he finished.

Luckily, Tang Yi was very quick to say, “It’s in that black bag, I just put it in yesterday.”

The black bag was given to Tang Yi by Gu Yanting last time. Tang Yi didn’t use it often, let alone put the ID card into it. Gu Yanting was very happy to hear it, and when he breathed a sigh of relief, a little man sprang up in his mind, pointing at him and laughing, gloating like a fool.

But after a while, another little man appeared, nervously reminding him, “Gu Yanting, Gu Yanting, you can’t be careless. Just because Tang Yi didn’t leave today doesn’t mean he won’t leave in the future. Otherwise, what is he doing with his documents? Have you forgotten how you broke up at the beginning?”

Gu Yanting gritted his teeth and sighed.

How could he forget? Tang Yi broke up very quickly, just like that. After taking his ID and wallet, he left without waiting for Gu Yanting to digest it. He didn’t want his clothes, he didn’t want his bed sheets, he didn’t want his savings, he just wanted to leave in style.

Gu Yanting didn’t know if his own reflex arc was too long, or if the Tang Yi-style break-up wounded him so much that left him with sequelae.

He was really scared. When other people broke up, they would cry and yell. First the prelude, then the main drama, and finally the climax. But not Tang Yi, ah. If he was not satisfied with his life, he could pack up at any time and leave with his documents.

The little man who was nervous and sweaty in his mind was victorious. Gu Yanting patted his head, found a black plastic bag very cleverly, put the documents of the two of them in the bag together, and then looked all over the house. After a circle, the bag was put in a place that Tang Yi would never have thought of. 

Without documents, Tang Yi couldn’t take a car, take a plane, stay in a hotel… even if he was angry, he would just have to punch Gu Yanting and vent, hehehe. Gu Yanting praised himself very arrogantly, recalled his various “sinful” and dangerous actions for days, and began to clean with the idea of atoning for his sins.

So when Tang Yi came home from the company, he saw a long row of underwear floating all over the balcony, including a few t-backs…

“Gu Yanting,” Tang Yi was shocked by the scene he witnessed before he even put down his bag.

Gu Yanting had just finished setting up the dishes when he saw Tang Yi’s expression and his heart fluttered for a moment. He was overjoyed in his heart, but his face was still demure, and he didn’t respond until he walked up to Tang Yi, “En?”

Tang Yi took a breath slowly; his beautiful eyes moved to Gu Yanting’s face and he asked in disbelief, “Did you make a mountain of them and jerk off on them?”

“……”

Gu Yanting was taken aback, “Who jerked off? I didn’t, where did I…” He followed Tang Yi’s gaze to the balcony and paused, “I just washed all our underwear.” 

“……” The corners of Tang Yi’s mouth twitched, but he quickly put the matter aside and instead talked about another more important matter, “I won’t go to the company tomorrow. I’ll go to Fat Sod first to help him with something. At noon, we will go to the airport straight after lunch.”

Gu Yanting was dumbfounded for a moment, “Go to the airport?”

“That’s right,” Tang Yi glanced at him strangely as he walked to the bedroom, “Didn’t we decide last week to go to Xi’an this weekend? By the way, don’t forget to put your ID card in that black bag and take it with you when you go out tomorrow.”

Gu Yanting stood still for a while, before he thought in a daze, Xi’an? Yes, he and Tang Yi were going to Xi’an and then to Dunhuang, so they left the dog with his parents. It was just that in the past two days, he had messy thoughts in his heart and had forgotten about it.

Gu Yanting breathed a sigh of relief, and when he turned around, he was suddenly taken aback.

He put away both his and Tang Yi’s ID cards. But… what was that place that Tang Yi absolutely couldn’t think of?

—

Two.

Nonsensical Ning Zeyu Extra

Classmate Ning Zeyu felt very desperate about this turbulent world.

However, despair is useless. Who made him a completely straight socialist young man while the good friends he had made since kindergarten were all little gays!

In the words of Ning Zeyu’s mother, this was either a gift or he was just good at it.

After seeing all kinds of simple or complicated families of his little gay friends, Classmate Ning Zeyu deeply understood one truth: the gift was his own mother. To think about it, he’d lived for more than twenty years and was about to reach thirty but had never seen anyone’s mother screw up her son like this.

“Er, you say that you have no one in your twenties. Do you fail to recognise yourself correctly?”

Ning Zeyu looked at his mother with a straight face, pretending not to understand the subtext, “I recognise myself very thoroughly, thank you.”

“Oh,” Mom Ning took a breath, “Then is there something you haven’t communicated with your mom about…”

“I personally think we communicate very well, thank you.”

“Then why don’t you have anyone yet?” Mom Ning blinked and still didn’t let him go. “How come there are no men or women?”

“……” Ning Zeyu wiped his face, “I don’t know…”

“Neither the old nor the young…” Mom tsked and was cut in the middle of the sentence; the good-natured Ning Zeyu finally couldn’t endure, and hurriedly shouted at the top of his lungs, “Lao Ning!”

Someone upstairs responded with the same loud voice, “Yes…”

“Take care of your wife!”

“Can’t control her…”

Ning Zeyu, “……”

Mom Ning gleefully demonstrated a scissor hand, “I haven’t finished speaking yet. You haven’t brought home neither the old nor the young ones, obviously you have a problem! When you were little, I told you to have a good relationship with your female classmates, but you just didn’t listen. Now that you are single, you still won’t admit it. Really, it’s too embarrassing for your mother. But I only have one son like you, so I’ll reluctantly give you a little advice…”

Ning Zeyu was in excited spirits and as soon as he was about to refuse, he saw his mother hand over two photos head-on, “The children of the old Qin family, better than you in every way!”

Ning Zeyu looked at the photo. It was a pretty girl, not bad. When he was about to accept it, the photo behind it also fell out.

“…why are there two people?”

“Take a look at both of them!”

“No,” Ning Zeyu was about to collapse, “I mean, why is there a man and a woman!”

For Ning Zeyu, the most miserable thing in the world was not that he was gay and couldn’t come out of the closet to his family, but that he was straight like a telephone pole, and the whole world thought he was gay.

Speaking of this, you can’t blame others. Among Ning Zeyu’s friends, nine out of ten were gay. When he was still in kindergarten, he comforted his childhood friend, his best friend Xiao Shi. Classmate Xiao Shi was laughed at by his classmates because he liked to wear girl’s clothing. Ning Zeyu patted his chest righteously and asked Mom Ning to buy him a tutu skirt to wear with Xiao Shi.

When he was in elementary school, his deskmate gave a boy a note that was rejected, and ended up crying uncontrollably. Classmate Ning Zeyu was overfilled with compassion and after following the sad girl for half a day went home to consult with Mom Ning on how to write notes to boys.

He didn’t remember what a tangled and complicated expression Mom Ning had at that time but he remembered that after that Mom Ning added one more sentence to her routine greeting when he got home.

It used to be, “Xiao Yu, are there any little girls you like at school?” Ning Zeyu shook his head and she didn’t ask anything else.

Later it was, “Xiao Yu, are there any little girls you like at school?” Ning Zeyu shook his head, and Mom Ning said, “What about little boys?” Ning Zeyu shook his head.

So Mom Ning would breathe a sigh of relief and say wisely, “If there is a little girl you like, you can talk to each other. With a little boy you shouldn’t.”

Classmate Ning Zeyu was surprised and asked her, “Why?”

Mom Ning looked serious, “Because little girls grow up and become more beautiful, and little boys grow up and become uglier. So you have to get to know a girl as soon as possible, but boys must wait until you become an adult.”

Ning Zeyu was suddenly enlightened, so he took these words to comfort a good friend he met in junior middle school. And for a long period of time afterwards, he regarded that instruction as the golden rule.

Not because of anything else, but because when he looked at himself in the mirror, it really did prove the saying that the more a boy grows, the uglier he becomes – when he was in primary school, his relatives were stroking his head and saying how cute he was. However, when he started high school, everyone’s gaze changed, filled with a mixture of shocked sympathy and words like “poor thing”, which repeatedly made Ning Zeyu wonder if he had experienced some great misfortune.

But as the ancients said, there must be gains and losses, and there must be gains if there are losses. Although Ning Zeyu was a little dark-skinned, a little skinny, and his face looked a little old, his popularity was exceptionally high and it was not an exaggeration to say that he had friends everywhere. He was loyal and broad-minded, and more importantly, no buddy was afraid that his girlfriend would fall in love with Ning Zeyu after seeing him.

These deep friendships allowed him to have his friends to help him in many exams, and he had never failed a subject since he was a child. Even when he graduated, a classmate handed him a job offer early on and helped him get his first order after he had successfully joined the company.

Ning Zeyu was very moved and went all the way to thank this classmate. As a result, he didn’t expect the other party to be drunk that day, hug him and gnaw on him.

It was really gnawing. Ning Zeyu’s first sensation at the time was pain and he supposed his skin was broken. His second reaction was: Lao Tzu’s first kiss was gone!

And then…

There was no more. The extremely irresponsible classmate took two bites. He probably felt that the taste was wrong, so he fell asleep with a grunt. Ning Zeyu had never had a boyfriend or girlfriend, so he was scared out of his wits by this gnawing and scurried back to T City overnight. The next day, his classmate called him. He had obviously forgotten everything about it and laughed at Ning Zeyu for being impolite and not staying even for a day.

Ning Zeyu wanted to remind him of what happened last night. But after thinking about it, he felt awkward and hung up.

It was just that his luck didn’t get better after that. Even though his appearance had changed a lot since he started working out, his height had increased, his muscles had grown and his face had become more angular, but he still couldn’t attract any human beings.

The two photos that Mom Ning gave him were simply the best-looking single people he had ever seen in recent years.

Ning Zeyu subconsciously wanted to throw away the picture of the young man, but after thinking of the kiss when he had been gnawed, his hand stopped.

What if it is an opportunity? 

What if you’re not so completely straight?

Well, go and have a look…

THE END

Translator’s note: Well, the story is over. I feel a little sad because I really liked it so much, I feel there will be no other like that. It was challenging but it also gave me so much as a translator; not to mention how dear to my heart Tang Yi and Gu Yanting are.

Big thanks to Blood for her comments and support, I can’t describe how important they were for me!!!

If you enjoyed the story, please leave a positive review and/or good rating on Novelupdates 🙂

Also, you can support me on Ko-fi 🙂

Previous / ToC